Birthdays Matter

So, it was my birthday yesterday. I used to hate birthdays. It sucks being that kid whose birthday falls near or on a holiday. Nobody has time to really focus on you. Now,  my parents were excellent about making sure I got Christmas and birthday presents independently. It was really kind of them to do that, given they had 8 other kids to worry about. However, not everybody else got the memo. And besides that, who wants to throw a birthday party the same week as Christmas? After a while, I started looking at my birthday as a big hassle. I didn't want to be a bother. I rarely complained other than right around the time. Eventually, I just started to ignore it altogether. Didn't seem like a big deal at the time. I still got presents, people still occasionally remembered to send cards and stuff. And the whole birthday thing just kind of faded out of my list of "gives a crap".

Then I started dating this girl. She acted like I was a big deal. That I mattered, a lot. She made it clear that she thought the world of me. I tried to brush it off, not let it get to me too much. Understand, I appreciated the effort. And I love this girl, to point of marrying her. I just had a problem with thinking much of myself. At the time we started dating, I was of the opinion that I was a failure. I had flunked college, got fired from two jobs and life wasn't going well. I wasn't even trying to be in love with her, because I though I wasn't good boyfriend material. That part got taken out of my hands. I fell for her like I'd stepped out of an airplane at 10,000 feet. So, anyway, two years after we started dating, she decided to throw me a surprise party. For my birthday. I'd let slip how much it sucked to have a birthday around the holidays. And apparently I came across as a bit bitter about it. So she got everyone in my life that could show up to do so. I walked into a room at the church my parents attended without a clue. And proceeded to receive the biggest "Happy Birthday" I've ever heard. Friends, family and just people I knew were there to wish me well and happy. My bitter cold heart towards birthdays melted on the spot. And I've never recovered. It was sweetest thing anyone's ever done for me.

My wife still makes a big out of me, especially about my birthday. And I love it. I don't even pretend to brush it off anymore. I now understand that it's important to have someone tell you that you matter. 

Because you do matter.